there was a moment where i need to make a decision in my life...this decision is really hard for me to deal with..i have to struggle with my own feeling to make this decision..it began when my bf asked me whether i choose him or i choose God.. i did not know on how to say about my feeling on that moment.. i love my bf very much..i look him as the gift from our Father God..but how can it ended like this..i had never thought that he will asked me with this question..i knew that i have to become more understanding as he comes from a 'pagan' family..so maybe that his parents had never taught about God's love to him..so, i did not blame him at all..when i made the decision, i choose God! i knew that i will upset with my own decision as i love him so much..but i love God more than him..so i need to forgot things about him and starts to begin a new life as he had asked to break up with me due to my decision.. i love him but i could not do anything more..i just want to have hope in God and i believe that someday he will understand why i choose God more than him..i was very upset with things that he had said with me..im so sorry...but, i still choose God.. even though that we had broke up, i will keep praying for him so that there will comes a day where he meet with someone who better than me and that girl able to bring him closer to God..i pray for his family so that they will open their heart to God and i pray for his health and his life..may God will continually bless him and i believe that God also had a wonderful plan for him in his life... then, actually i thought that things had ended..but it is not! i keep asking God on why did He had given me the moment to know him and in a relationship with him even though that he is not for me..i am asking God why did He let me to go through with all of this???
then, there comes a moment where God answered my prayer and my question.. i had a dream..in that dream, i was sitting down and there are a man..i look up on his face but i could not see him clearly as his face is shining with a light..then, he said to me, an example of faith that delighted God's heart is a faith show by Abraham.. Abraham choose God more than his one and only son!! at that moment, i woke up and i know that the dream i have is from God.. He is trying to say with me that He thankful as i had chosen Him more than my bf too..so, my situation is the same as what Abraham had experienced before..i had been tested! i thank God as i had choose the right decision..and i pray that i want to live my life to praise Him always and forever! thank my Father Lord for Your blessing and each little things that You had done in my life..i pray that let Your will that be done in me..thank you Lord..thank you Lord Jesus..i want to lay down, to serve You, no matter what the cost Father..thank you Jesus..hold me Jesus and I know that Jesus is in me.. Jesus is with me to face with all the circumstances that i have in my life..but, i pray that God will continually bless me and my life! Halelluyah! Praise Lord Jesus! Praise Lord Jesus!! amen! :)
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